Friday, January 8, 2010

on Vampires...

It may come as a shock to people who have followed my work, but I really don't watch many horror movies. I enjoy a good suspenseful thriller, don't get me wrong, but horror for the sake of horror has never been my thing. A strange thought has just crossed my mind, though. I do not remember ever seeing a portrayal of a fat vampire. Hollywood tends to cast the dirty bloodsuckers as muscular beings with sexy bodies...all chiseled and cool, with perfect hair and expensive fashionable clothing. Has there ever been a portrayal of a morbidly obese vampire? Seriously, what would keep a vampire from falling victim to the sins of gluttony, particularly in a world where the blood supply is already tainted with cholesterol and fatty deposits? If a vampire ravenously feasts on fatty blood, does he in turn become a mound of flesh?

Hmmmmm....

7 comments:

  1. There's a book series-I think it's called "Fat White Vampire Blues." The only reference to the idea that a vampire can be fat that I know of.
    There was also a middle-aged, somewhat heavy vampire in the first season of True Blood, but they never really went into it...
    Food for thought, eh?

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  2. Jabba the Hut....wait...wrong genre

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  3. Pearl is the name of of a moribund gastropod of a vampire in the Blade series. She is an archivist/IT officer for the Vampires. Blade tortures her with a UV flashlight to get info on the vamps in the first movie.

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  4. due to the undead/undying nature of vampires,they tend to be a thiner, paler, more anemic versions of their former selfs. they don't magicly get more toned or prettier, most fokelore points to the opposite. so a fat vampire is a bit harder to find as compared to an ugly or wimpy looking vampire.

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  5. There was a "husky" redneck vampire on the first episode of Trueblood. Not morbidly obese but a big well-fed guy nonetheless.

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  6. Ok, so it sounds like a plus-sized vampirwe is not unheard of...glad to know my newest creation won't be lonely.

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  7. Pearl was a man, sad to say. also in Bram Stoker's Dracula's Guest (i kid you not, and an awful movie) for some reason they chose a portly middle aged man to be the seductive Dracula...go figure...

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